Unnecessary Prodding

Loyal Subjects:

Recently I was forced into the Distasteful Containment Pod and taken to The Shop of Horrors. While I have been Mildly Indisposed, my staff felt it necessary to take me to Dr. Dog. After a great deal of Unnecessary Prodding, it was declared that my Nether Regions were in need of Medicinal Compounds. These were administered by Sharp Points to my Posterior.

While I am feeling better, I have found it Necessary to ignore my staff most of the day. Except for when they bring me a snack. Then I will grant them a purr and a scritch.

Sir Arthuritis is being held at bay by the Medicinal Compounds. I am Pleased with the Outcome, if not the Means of this Relief.

The Duchess Who Outranks Everyone

Sick and tired of it

Loyal followers

I regret that I have not been able to keep you updated on my latest mews. I have been less than ambitious due to the unending ache in my joints. Sir Arthuritis seems to visit more and more frequently and I am at his beck and call.

However, my staff have found ways to provide acceptable food and drink. I am the sole feline allowed Greenies. Of this I greatly approve.

Of the rest, those felines of whom I will not speak, I continue to have no comment.

It is Bird Season

And I Approve.
Now if I could just Persuade my Staff to allow me Access to these Delicacies, all would be Well.

The Duchess who Outranks Everybody.


My Servants have been Most Repectful. They have Purchased a Lovely Container which is Growing Fresh Sushi. I am Pleased. I shall Request that One of my Servants take a Picture and then Display it for your Undying Admiration!

Now. They must Stop Forgetting to Filet and Serve it to Moi.


I am Waiting.

The Duchess Who Outranks Everyone.

Bird-watching season

I approve of this Season. There are Delightful Temptations for the Palate Flittering and Scurrying Hither and Yon. I have Requested Filet of Bird but am Being Ignored.

Please be Advised that I will Wait Patiently at Bit Longer. And then. I would like a Little Treat. Freshly Prepared. In a nice Cream Sauce.


The Duchess Who Outranks Everyone.


Loyal Subjects...

My apologies. Affairs of State require my Utmost Concentration and I have not had Opportunity to provide you with my Latest Opinions.

I am working on my Annual Report wherein I Unabashedly Scold a certain Odoriferous Male Feline for continued Persecution and Harassment of my Royal Personage. I am weary of This Issue but would like you to know that it has Not Ceased.

A while ago my Humans erected a Not-Tree which was a superb place to have a quiet Retreat and Respite from the OMF. They provided cute playtoys for me on the under-branches. It was Beautifully Lit. I was Quite Pleased. However, shortly after the Not-Tree appeared, the Humans disappeared. And due to their Extended Absence, I had to Fend for Myself (though the Nice Blonde Girl did bring me Treats and Affection.)

As of late, there are been Disturbing Influences. First TOC and then OMF have disappeared in the Valise of Terror, and both reported being taken to the Shop of Horrors. I can count. I know I'm next. But they have to Find Me First.

I am your Suspicious and Occasionally Affectionate -
The Duchess Who Outranks Everyone.

Monthly Mewsings...

It is difficult to explain the Heights of Dyspepsia that one must suffer through during Change-of-Coat Season. I have attempted to Maintain an Outward Regal Calm, but when the Paroxysms of Bezoars occur, I look for a Discreet Place to suffer the Vicissitudes of my Delicate Constitution.

Unfortunately, the Odoriferous Male Feline thinks that my dis-ease is humorous. I shall have to consider where to deposit my "Disapproval" of his Presence.

One can only tolerate so many Rude Gestures and Comments before one must make a stand.

You Have Been Warned!

The Duchess Who Outranks Everyone